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Death Tank Zwei

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Released: 1997

Genre: Shoot-’em-up

Format reviewed: Sega Saturn

Publisher: BMG Interactive

Developer: Lobotomy

Submitted by: Phil Harrison

Death Tank was only available if you collected all 26 Team Dolls in Powerslave in the US (known as Exhumed in the UK). OR Death Tank Zwei, squirreled away in Duke Nukem 3D as a blank on the options screen; it appeared if you either a. Have a saved game in your Saturn’s memory of another Lobotomy Software title (Quake or Exhumed) or b. Break every toilet in Duke Nukem 3D (this may be my memory playing tricks with me).

Before we start, this is serious business: friendships will be ruined, insults traded, missiles thrown and grudges cemented. Welcome to the end of your 1st round in Death Tank Zwei.

You control a brightly coloured trapezium with a large, incorporeal arrow pointing out toward the heavens. Up and Down make the arrow large and small and corresponds to the strength of your shot. Left and Right alter the angle by which your square pixel containing a large fire triangle travels. Your ‘tank’ is outclassed in maneuverability by accessibility scooters with modest gradients thwarting attempts to move. The single screen levels are randomly generated, deform and eventually flatten with earthquakes.

Worry naught, for the end of the round brings a tuck shop of ammunitions, nuclear capability and defensive options.

Money is raised from the smoldering remains of your best friends 4-sided shapes. Shields, anti-gravity, air-strikes, machine guns, nukes, rolling mines, remote controlled missiles! JOY!

Mix in the legendary blitz round where the reload time of your weapons is SLASHED, air drops of money where you can shoot the planes out of the sky to release ever more funds and the scrap to reach them. Buried Super Weapons that can’t be bought but claimed from leveling the scenery to reveal it or forcefully removing it from a friend.

It’s real time, it’s fast paced, you can set an almost unlimited number of rounds, it has SEVEN PLAYERS at once and launch your 6 button d-pad at your friends face with force.

At the end your face hurts with the strain of the mouth muscles maintaining a 3 hour grin.